Build an Emergency Supply of Light: Alana’s Story

By Alana G. // Beyond A Maze


Pause for a moment now and look inwards. What do you see or hear? We have roughly 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts in a day. Many of those we tend to focus on can be negative ones. I often struggle with negative self-talk, especially during stressful periods. Through this piece, I’d like to share that light can be created even in the darkest moments by building ‘emergency power supply’.

On seemingly insurmountable days when positive thoughts are impossible, it can be difficult to ‘snap out of it’. The critical voice of mine plays puts me down.

Why are you so average, so… unlovable?

No one really cares, you are on your own.

Are you even worthy of love and happiness?

The world could possibly be better off without your existence.

They drown out much needed neutral or positive thoughts. They stay in my line of vision, rendering me oblivious to important matters. They distract me from being who I can and want to be.

Pushing them away requires a great deal of energy, and unfortunately, they always return.

Till today, it has been a journey of healing and exploring coping mechanisms. What has worked for me may not work for everyone, and I urge you to go through the process of self-discovery. Here, I share three methods I personally find helpful to overcome negative self-talk.

Journaling

Before I sleep, I write about my day and what I felt. I may also journal in the day if I find myself spiralling into negative thoughts. As I write, I examine these thoughts. Are they real? What would the optimistic self refute them with? Writing out these internal debates helps with gaining insights and a certain clarity over the situations I am upset about.

Yoga

On the yoga mat, I fight off the monkeys in my head. I create a time and space to be mindfully present. I’m reminded to breathe, and to accept that my body has its limitations. Yet, I am kind enough to celebrate its strength. I like yoga as it can be gentle yet strengthening, with many beautiful lessons to bring off the mat.

Meditation

Meditation goees hand in hand with yoga, and is a lot more portable. There are many forms of meditation but I started simple: focusing on the breath for two to five minutes. Progressively, I explored various guided meditations. Meditation trains the mind to take on the observer role. The ability to make the switch in moments of self-doubt and distressing emotions is immensely helpful in processing them.

These mindful practices flex the self-love muscles. A part of us knows how to be gentle and loving, brave and strong. This part of us can calm the monsters that live in our mind’s closet. When the monsters come out, this part of us will embrace them with love and compassion.

As Martin Luther King Jr said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

Thrive on your love, not just for others, but for yourself.


Alana cares deeply about mental, and emotional wellness. She believes that we all have great capacity to love, and the power to empower others through the work we do. Reading gives her much joy and healing, so she hopes to spread the love for reading.

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