By Shannon //
Dear Shannon,
It’s been more than five years since your first panic attack. During this turbulent time, you have experienced your fair share of ups and downs, and here are four lessons I wish you had learnt earlier.
- It’s okay to not be okay
It is totally fine to feel depressed, anxious, sad, or angry. These are normal emotions to feel, and it is what makes us feel alive and human. It’s not always about fighting these feelings, but being able to sit with them and making them your friends.
- Progress not perfection
During this recovery process, it is normal to want to chase perfection and “recover”. But what exactly are you chasing? No one is expecting you to be perfect; what’s more important is that you make progress and be a better version of yourself each day. Take little steps, pick up and apply the skills you learnt in therapy, and try your best to navigate this harsh world we live in.
- It’s not about “recovering from” but “living with” depression
Just like the above point, sometimes we go all out to want to be this perfect person who has “recovered” from depression. But I want to tell you that relapses will happen no matter how hard you try, and things will not always go as planned. Again, it’s not about chasing away this depressed feeling, but about sitting with it and making it your friend.
- You are your worst enemy
There will be times where you feel like the whole world is against you and you are all alone in this battle of recovery. But do you know what makes this whole thing worse? It’s that little voice in you that’s telling you, “You will never be good enough”. You are your biggest critic! We all have this inner critic in us. Learn to be kind to yourself and give yourself a pat on your shoulder for making it past each day. Learn to tell yourself that “it is okay to fail” and learn to encourage yourself by telling yourself “good job” when needed.
One cut doesn’t mean you’re broken, one panic attack doesn’t mean you’re crazy, and one relapse doesn’t mean you’ve regressed. Press on, it’s going to be a long journey ahead, but I’m sure you will make it one day. You can be your worst enemy, but you can also be your biggest cheerleader. All the best, and know that I’m always rooting for you!
Love,
Shannon
Shannon, 18, is currently pursuing her diploma in Business Studies. Having been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Depression, she hopes to inspire others with her strength and resilience, and advocate more for mental health. She also participates in TTP’s weekly journaling club, Sojourners.
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